Visit on December 3rd

Well this morning I decided that since the weather was okay, that I was going to drive to Hamilton to visit Ayden. Boy am I glad I did. What a great day I had.

Ayden had another spinal tap yesterday. They took another 2.5 milliliters out of his spine/head. Because of this he is doing great. He only had one apnea spell at midnight last night, his oxygen needs were down to 38% and his feeding has been increased to 7 mil’s ever hour and a half.

When I got to the hospital, I asked the nurse if I would be able to hold my baby today as the last two times I have asked I was not allowed due to the busy unit and lack of nurses, plus Ayden was on a bit more oxygen and they did not feel that he would handle well. today however, the nurse gave me the go ahead!  Talk about being excited….

The nurse put Ayden on my chest and he did great. His oxygen did not increase, he did not “swing” as much when he was on me and his heart rate was awesome!  I also hummed to him while he was on my chest as well. It was funny, when I hummed to him, he stopped being fidgety and calmed down a bit….

and guess what….I HELD HIM FOR 2 HOURS!!!!!

normally at his gestational age, you get at most about a half an hour, but he was being so good and just sleeping peacefully, that the nurses said to try to stay as long as possible and it felt great. There is a connection and bond there that no one can understand unless you are a mom…

At about two hours, Ayden started to get a bit fidgety, so I decided that he had enough and it was time for him to go back into his bed…We put him back in his bed, and then the nurse changed his diaper and made sure he was comfortable.

Another good thing is that his weight was up again today. He was 832 grams yesterday and today 835, so slowly and surely he is gaining.

I did talk to the doctor today, they are going to discuss whether it would be best to do regular spinal taps on Ayden rather then waiting for the ultrasound and waiting for his head to enlarge. they are also going to keep the 7 mil feeding for a few days and then after that will up it to 8. They are also going to try to slow down his oxygen and see how he does. the doctor was very clear that due to the head injuries, it is expected that Ayden will “swing” however he wants to look at the longer term numbers rather then jumping on the short term. Rather then changing his oxygen right away cause he is swinging, they are going to monitor over a few hours to see what the swinging shows…

Anyways, today was a GREAT day with Ayden. I am so glad that I went to see him. As his mom, I need the skin to skin time. It’s really hard when he is in NICU as you don’t know where or what your place is. How do you fit into the picture of taking care of him. There are things that I can help with now that I have been there for a bit, like changing his diaper, and cleaning his mouth when there is a bit of goop there…but having skin to skin is something that is just between me and Ayden. This is something that the nurses don’t do and it’s really nice to have something just the two of us, no one else can do. I am starting to feel more connected to him, and when I am at the hospital, I find that I want to take part more and help. Today when I got there, he had some goop on his lip, so rather then the nurse taking a cloth to clean it up, I asked if I was alright to go ahead and I was given the green light. I am finding my place there, and its really nice to have a connection now with Ayden. I don’t even see the monitors any more and the cables and lines he is hooked up to don’t scare me as much….

What a wonderful day!!!