Updates from Mom

well, what an amazing couple of days we have had. Ayden has been doing really well. As you have read in the last couple of posts from Dad that they have up’d his feedings…even today they are trying to feed 3 milliliters every 2 hours to see how our little button tolerates the milk. So far, so good!

One of the hardest things as a new mom is not being able to hold or even touch your child. I did hold Ayden’s hand on the day he was born, but since then Mark and I have not touched him as we want to be as careful as possible (germs and also his skin is so fragile we don’t want to nick it by accident…) the other day however, I could not help it. The nurse kind of gave me the go ahead to open the doors on the incubator and touch him. Well, I took the advantage given. I opened the door and held his hand and also rubbed his back. it’s the most amazing feeling. His skin is so soft and warm and it feels so good to touch him. i just want to pick him up and snuggle with him, but alas I will enjoy the touches that I can give to him right now. when he gets a bit stronger, the nurses let you do what is called Kangaroo time. This is when you are allowed to put your baby on your chest so that you have skin to skin contact. It lasts for as long as the baby can tolerate being out of the incubator, could be 5 minutes or an hour, basically Ayden calls the shots on this. I can’t wait to hold him for the first time…I can’t even imagine what that feels like. To hold your own child…Feel his body against yours and to know that he can feel you, to know that he can hear my heart beat just like when he was still in utero….I think that is going to be amazing, but I have to wait until he is much much stronger for that…baby steps…at least I am able to touch him, limited touches but I will take whatever I can.

As for my health, I am on anti-biotics and also taking advil to help with the pain. There are times in the day when I feel pretty crappy, but then I just think of Ayden and all is better…

It’s funny, whenever we go to see him, we forget about all the stress and problems going on. He lights a little fire inside us and we feel so happy and hopeful. Each time we leave him, we don’t feel sad to say see you later, we both feel uplifted to know that we had a good visit and that he is doing well.

I can’t wait to see him again tomorrow!!!