Mommy’s thoughts

Well Ayden, it’s hard to believe that at this time last year, I was in the hospital in Hamilton trying to keep you in-utero for as long as we could. On Nov 6th, 2008 Grampy and I went for an ultrasound and then I ended up in the hospital in Hamilton on bed rest. It was a very hard time in my life, but nothing compared to what we have been though with you over the last year. Reading back and looking at the pictures, you have come so far and I am so very proud of you….but I am also proud of your dad and I as well. It takes strong people and a strong couple to go though everything we have been through to get you but also to keep you. Never once did we second guess eachother or our relationship. We love eachother so very much and in turn that allows us to be strong for you in your times of need…
It’s so strange for me now. I used to not think much of birthdays. I mean, yah, its my birthday, I get a cake and some presents…but now that I am a mom and been through everything joyous and traumatic, this means something different for me. It’s so hard to explain and I don’t know that anyone will ever understand, but as a parent this just means so much more. It brings back all the memories of what happened. It brings back the stresses, the worries, but also so much more then all that, it brings a joy and happiness to my heart that I can’t express in words. To know that your dad and I gave you life and that the medical community and our love kept you in this world…you will never know how much you mean to me. You are my special little guy and always will be. even when you are older and you hopefully have a sibling or two, you Ayden will always hold a special place in my heart. I spent almost every day at the hospital with you. I did whatever I could to be there for you and let you know that I was never going to leave you….and I never ever will. I will always be there for you in whatever you need. I will help you through illnesses, appointments, and I will be there for all the happy times too.
Your birthday is in 2 days. It’s hard to believe that you will be one year old this friday. I can’t even begin to think what the next year will hold for you, but I am sure it will be fun. I will celebrate the day, and I will remember that at 7:32 am on Nov 13, 2008 you came into this world. You were a teeny tiny little boy, so frail and weak….but you are now 17 pounds, strong willed and happy.

Ayden, I love you more then you will ever know….